What can I do with a Guy who's a "Scrooge"?
How do I tell my boyfriend that he's cheap? He's great in every other way, but his inability to spend a buck is really a bummer.
According to an informal poll (very informal because it consisted of 40 friends and friends-of-friends in the U.K. somewhere), women would rather date a man who's a so-so kisser than one who's a tight-arse! But, as you say he's got other fabulous qualities, let's look at how you can help him modify his Scrooge-like tendencies rather than discussing tactics to hook you up with a sugar daddy.
Your worst tactic is to put him on the defensive, as if somethings wrong. Many people value you their ability to be frugle with money, and think others feel the same.
So, don't start out by calling him cheap or get huffy when he holds onto his money. Let him know how much you care for him, and what you like about him, then gently launch into a general discussion on money. Explain how your money views and values were shaped. Then ask him to share his money ideas with you.
Did you know that many of the wealthiest people got that way through frugality.
Where did his fears about spending come from? Were his parents unemployed for long stretches of time or rich beyond measure but mean with it? Remember, money is often tied to our feelings of security or self-worth. Gently let him know that his reluctance to spend money on you makes you feel he doesn't value you. End by suggesting a compromise: You cook him dinner and rent a movie three dates in a row, then he takes you out somewhere wonderful.
It takes 21 days to change a habit!
If, despite his innate cheapness, he's open to compromise, you've got a keeper. A man who wants to please his partner is better than money in the bank. Well, almost.
